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Additions to Albert Goldbarth's "Library," April 20, 2001

Nita Spittel - maple ridge, (Canada):

At first I disliked the book. Fat and seldom read, it wears
    its gold letter on its spine like a scepter lording it over
    the not so fat ones.
I once saw a bespectacled man wearing tweed jacket with leather patched
    elbows,reached for the book. He looked like a professor, at least that's
    what I think a professor looks like. I watched him leafed through
    the pages with such reverence like touching a holy relic while a
    smile of conviction crossed his face.
That was when the book coerced me to open it. The words
    jumped out and made themselves at home in my cerebrum, slaking thirst
    I did not know I had. Water dranked in an arid desert.The
    book rode a camel sauntering by and was gone.
Later, I learned that the "professor" was an anxious man who knew
    that the book spoke the truth about nothingness.
And the man wants the book to stay with him when he
    tells his family, he lost his job three months ago.

Bennett Rader - Plymouth, Ohio (USA):

This is a book by James Watt. Some say it is
    reactionary, the rest say it is not biodegradable and should be burned
    at the stake.
Brother Bret was pleased to be on the receiving end of the
    great deal explained by this book.
This book finds Sunday a good day to worship at the laundromat.
This book watches oldies T.V. and old movies and listens to old
    time rock 'n' roll, but it is very up to date.
Sometimes this book becomes alarmed and rouses its readers. Sometimes it
    arouses them.

Alfred J Bruey - Jackson, MI (USA):

This book was scheduled to be shelved on April 19th but was
    not shelved until April 20th because defects in automation delayed its arrival.
This book means different things to different people. To some, it's an
    explanation of life. To others it's gibberish. Philosophers love it because it
    gives them an explanation of everything in the universe. Children love it
    because of all the pictures of unusual animals.
This book played football all the way through college. Now it's 23
    years old with a poor education, no pro football contract, and two
    knees that will hurt forever.
This book is happy sitting on the shelf. It wants you to
    quit reading so much. It wants you to get out among the
    people and enjoy life.
This book can be read anytime except Saturday afternoon. On Saturday afternoon,
    it insists on being placed where it can see a Big 10
    football game on TV.

Sarolina Shen Chang - Canton, Michigan (USA):

This is the book about the Empress Dowager of Ching Dynasty who
    built a marble boat and anchored it in the lake of the
    royal garden. The boat never set sail to the seas.
    She never got sea-sickness.
This is the book about the ill-fortuned Han diplomat, Su Wu, who
    got detained by the Huns who became popular because of the Disney
    movie, Mu Lan. The Hun lord violated the international law by
    ordering Su Wu to the remotest frozen frontier to shepherd the he-goats.
    Su Wu could return home only when the he-goats bore lambs.
This is the book about the goats which escaped from the remotest
    frozen frontier and came to the bridge where a troll was waiting.
This is the book about Wang Zhao Jun of Han Dynasty, whose
    official portrait was added a dark mole because she didn't care bribe
    the palace artist. The Han emperor, of course, couldn't have a
    concubine this ugly. So Wang Zhao Jun was slighted until the
    sequel of this book was written.
This is The Sequel. When the Huns threatened another invasion, the
    Han emperor let the girl he thought ugly marry the Hun lord.
    To pacify the barbarian, he chuckled to himself. It was
    at the wedding/farewell ceremony that the Han emperor realized he'd made the
    most terrible mistake of his life. He'd just given away the
    most beautiful girl from his domain.

liz neil - qld, (australia):

and the poets of redemption shall express utter hindrence to its continuence
    in its secluded nonformatted preview of pendulant society and motionless visitations from
    ones above who look down violently noting our indifference and consequence of
    action. Have thought toward that and this book shall return to
    man before man return to the written word in this book that
    succeeds him.

Kevin W. Grossman - Santa Cruz, CA (USA):

David and his sister Devon found this book while randomly perusing authors
    "Pi - Pinch" in their local library. This book is called
    "Elementary Entrepreneurs" by T.M. Pillingham.
They checked it out after reading chapter three, "Corner Carnies," and eager
    to make a quick buck or two decided to hold their own
    neighborhood carnival complete with ring toss, baseball throw, weight guessing, dime pitch,
    water balloon toss, lawn darts, and fortune telling. Quite an undertaking
    for an entire group of people, much less two mind you.
They canvassed their native quarter with handsome handmade flyers one Saturday morning
    announcing "Come to the Fun - Carnival at 1:00," prepared all the
    games, and dug the prizes out of their forgotten unwanted toy boxes
    in the garage. To their disbelief the neighbor folk arrived in
    droves at exactly 1:00 p.m.
Sometime around 7:30 p.m., long after the carnival had ended, someone pounded
    fiercely on their front door. Eleven-year-old David answered the door and
    to his dismay thirty angry parents demanded their children's money back.
    His nine-year-old sister Devon ran to her room and cried. They
    were both spanked by their own angry parents and grounded for two
    weeks.
The library called the very next Monday morning stating that this book
    must be returned immediately because it was being banned by the Better
    Business Bureau. Thirty angry parents and Child Protective Services filed a
    civil suit against T.M. Pillingham one week later.

Sarolina Shen Chang - Canton, Michigan (USA):

This book has grown an inch since I last measured it.
This book is a collection of multi-cultural multi-lingual good-byes.
This book is a collection of second opinions HMO approved. It
    was written in fine prints.
This is the book about the dog hopped aboard a train looking
    for the chef who used to throw him a bone from the
    train kitchen. The dog tarveled all through Italy, train after train,
    free, returned to the same station, the same platform, waiting again for
    a bone.
This is the book about the girl scout cookies which got crushed
    by Dow.

Jennifer Bosveld - Johnstown/Columbus, Ohio (USA):

This book The Alphabet of Desire by Barbara Hamby was chosen by
    the New York Public Library as one of the 25 best books
    of 1999 and on my refrigerator hangs a postcard handwritten from Barbara
    listing the 15 poets we ought to have in our library here
    in order to not be embarrassed. That list is....
This book--a one page book that reads: Anne Sexton, Sylvia Plath, Dorothy
    Parker whose books I'm continually turning down on ebay and perhaps should
    rethink, William Carlos Williams, William Stafford, William Wordsworth, Alfred Houseman, William Butler
    Yeats, Wallace Stevens, Theodore Roetke, Gwendolyn Brooks, Emily Dickinson, W.H. Auden, Andrew
    Marvell, Marianne Moore which I share on this day when Hamby is
    the featured poet on
This book, this website, which is a new book everyday for our
    evolution.

Peg Duthie - Nashville, TN (USA):

This book was brought to this morning's convening of the Fresh Rashers
    of Nashville. We were very careful, but a fleck of matzoi
    brei still landed on page 221.
This book was purchased by a completist collector, even though the only
    thing that changed between editions was the cover.
This book really needs to be illustrated by Thomas Canty, who would
    not be appropriate for Larry Levis or William Mathews but could concoct
    something gloriously intricate for Albert Goldbarth.
This book mentions Michael Drayton on three pages, each time as a
    rival of Shakespeare.
This book falls open at the page that bears "Since there's no
    help, then, let us kiss and part..."

Katherine Borghardt - Ottawa, KS (USA):

Deja vu
not quite the same as yesterday
which had a hunk torn out of its middle
and left it with a hollow feeling
the work, no doubt, of cyberthieves or ethernets
or maybe The Provider:
the quality of the cover of this book,
the color of the images within,
the postural assumption of its backbone,
all in direct proportion to the depth of our contributory lives,
at once shallow and tepid / deep and mesmerizing

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