Alfred J Bruey - Jackson, MI (USA):
This book is ready for circulation. If no one checks it out
within 24 hours, terrible things will happen. Pass this message on to
at least 10 more people and send a copy back to the
person who sent it to you.
This book was taken to lunch every day for three weeks and
it never once offered to pay for the meal.
This book needs emergency care. It was knocked to the floor by
the bully-book next to it and its pages are torn and its
spine is cracked.
This book is very large because it tells you how to do
all your home repairs using only a pencil, a hammer, a sextant,
three safety pins, and two screwdrivers.
This book contains instructions on how to get anywhere you want to
go no matter where you are starting from as long as you
start from downtown Lisbon, Portugal, and want to go to the Merchandise
Mart in Chicago.
Peg Duthie - Nashville, TN (USA):
This book was used as an ad-hoc seating pad in the bleachers
of Comiskey Park.
This book was used as a coaster for three shots of Jamesons.
This book had several post-its stuck in it to mark key definitions,
but my puppy chewed them off.
This book was dropped into a mailbox without any wrapping or postage
on it whatsoever.
I fell asleep with this book on my chest, and the cat
nestled against it like a pillow.
Sarolina Shen Chang - Canton, Michigan (USA):
This book is about bridges from all over the world, including the
one over the West Lake where Lady White, who actually was a
snake, met her future husband. The author is now involved in
a copy right law suit because he didn't have the permission to
use Lady White's name in his book. Dr. Dolittle from Puddleby-on-the-Marsh
is the court-appointed interpreter.
This book is about the monk, who revealed Lady White's real identity
to her husband, and the wars between the monk and Lady White,
the snake. The monk's temple, Gold Mountain, as well as the
village, was submerged by the waters this 1000-year-old snake commanded. In
the end, the snake lost and had been imprisoned under the Lei
The author of previous book is now in hiding since the CNN's
live report of the collapse of Lei Feng pagoda. There was
no evidence proved the snake was ever imprisoned there. CNN will
run a special edition of Burden of Proof with Greta Van Susteren
live from where Lei Feng pagoda fell.
This book is about the boy who knew how to weigh an
elephant in the Third Century China. The elephant was lead into
a boat, the water level was marked, the elephant was then replaced
by rocks until the same water level was reached. The weight
of all the rocks = that of the elephant. The elephant and
the rocks lived equally happy ever after.
This is the book about Mencius' widowed mother who moved three times
before she found the good school district where Mencius learned to be
one of the great philosophers, second only to Confucius.
Sandeep Gautam - Gurgaon, Haryana (India):
This book can blush without season. It was launched to collide with
the festival of Holi, which marks the beginning of spring. "Wow,
what a marketing strategy" said my mom " it will be a
This book(tm) is often refreerd by Bill, Ph.D. in sci.psychology.psychotherapy.moderated.
This book is your gateway to eternal life. The 10 easy steps
to become immortal. Its author has been dead for quite some time
now. His forthcoming title will be on reincarnation.
This book must be seen to be believed! For rights of picturisation
contact the publishers.
This book can predict doom. The steadfast man will cross a river.
It is auspiscious to see a seagull.
George Costo - Toronto, (Canada):
This book should be buried
This book is ordained,touched,soulful,reads like a song,melodic.
This books words spew forth language best kept entombed
This book makes one wash ones hands
This books a downer,a upper,a drunk,drugged enduced bender,cant take this book anylonger.
DAVID BATES - LEAWOOD, KS (USA):
THIS BOOK IS THICK AND HEAVY,
I HAVE YET TO FIND WHERE IT OPENS,
TO THE LEFT, RIGHT OR IN MY MIND,
I HAVE NO ANSWERS, BUT I DO HAVE MY BOOK,
AAHH, A NICE PAPER WEIGHT.
Lauren - Shawnee Mission, KS (USA):
From this book, I only read snippits.
This book made me crave mint chocolate chip icecream.
This book was the perfect remedy for a rainy and especially gloomy
This book taught me how to say mixed vegetables in Italian- Misto
This book gave me a whole new appreciation for indoor plumbing.
Katherine Borghardt - Ottawa, KS (USA):
We ascended to the pinnacle
and now in our decline
this book can end like fiery hell
or wag the dog behind!
Bennett Rader - Plymouth, Ohio (USA):
No one knew how this book had come to be on the
floor, damaged, until a biography of Teddy Roosevelt yelled, "Bully."
For punishment, this bully-book was placed on the Reserve shelf under the
circulation desk where it only received ambient fluorescent light and could only
see the librarians from the knees on down.
This book that was knocked to the floor had always been a
sad book. It was filled with 3,000 poems about angst, and
grief, and lost loves and spouses, and pretty yellow flowers on a
green hill under blue sky with white clouds and other adjective-adverb overload
poems that caused illness among its readers.
This damaged book cost the poet fifty bucks to be included because
she didn't win and that's without a bio or photo.
This book was donated to the library by the poet because she
wanted someone else to read her poem.
Maggie Bash - Mission Hills, KS (USA):
This book taught me how fortunate I am
This book taught me to appreciate photography
My mom read this book to me every night -- a ritual
This book is passed around my family for support
This book is the last thing I read before I fall asleep
Jennifer Bosveld - Johnstown/Columbus, Ohio (USA):
this book is full of shit and rubies