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Anthony Robinson - Eugene, Oregon (USA):

April 05, 2001:
This book tells the story, on page 37, of the colossal fistfight
    between Kent Johnson (who hacked a hoax or two) and Gabriel Gudding,
    who had a mighty cold. The victor, by split decision, was a
    tiny cockroach.
If you lick this book it will leak, if you smell this
    book, it will smile, if you fear this book, it shall catch
    fire and fume and foam like the burning sea of the yellow
    spaniel.
This book likes salami and pacific treefrogs, both of which are scarce
    in Muncie, Indiana.
Good advice to be found here, in this book--don't swim while eating.
    Keep the walrus in your pants.
This book has a plan: a tired folding map, tucked way
    into the back, behind the uvula, past the larynx, far into the
    cavern of birds and burnt toast: this book eats children and dispenses
    iodine.