because she taught me butter, saute all of the butter                                                   add all of the sugar                                                                stir in all of the heavy creamlick the bowl,      spatula,                      whisk,       fingers cleanour home was all           doughy                          sprinkled and whip           creamed             until I turned fourteen                      and thenI was “only eat a third of your plate,”   and                      “excuse yourself                    if you ate too much,        brush your teeth after.”and I was all tears, confectioned            and confused                     taught to savor                now a mouth full of acrid          astringent           and       acid        more mouthwash than    marmalade        biscuits,         sweet tea               and she was all “you don’twant to be two pounds of sausage                                  in a one pound casing,” when I was         just                       gumbo and red beans and rice                 kolaches with cheese           and she always told me           to develop flavor          and that whenI grow up I’ll be more particular                so I did,      I’m elbow deep         in love, because    she swore you could taste it and my teeth  are rotting     from practicing her banana pudding,             coconut cream                                  queen anne’ s lace    double chocolate       notkneeling over porcelain,         knees to linoleum,                   and I can’t                        see my ribs anymore                 but I can’t see                                     the end        either